Why You Hate Being Interrupted When You’re Focused (Even Though You Interrupt Others)

Have you ever felt your brain go blank the moment someone cuts you off while you're deep in thought?

For people with ADHD, that feeling is intense. Interruptions can crash focus in seconds, and getting it back is not easy. Thoughts vanish. Emotions flare. Time feels warped. Even though it feels awful to be interrupted, you might find yourself doing it to others, too.

Why does this happen?

ADHD affects attention, memory, and emotions in ways that make both interrupting and being interrupted feel overwhelming.

The Pain of Lost Focus

For individuals with ADHD, being interrupted can feel like the entire task is erased. That’s because regaining focus takes time and energy that the ADHD brain struggles to summon.

Research shows that it takes about 23 minutes to fully return to a task after an interruption. This delay is already frustrating for anyone. But for people with ADHD, the impact is even greater.

According to Dr. Thomas E. Brown, when someone with ADHD is interrupted, it’s like “losing the thread.” The mind drops everything. Thoughts scatter. A sentence vanishes halfway. The entire sense of direction is gone. This can make people feel mentally blank, irritated, or emotionally overwhelmed.

These moments can feel like a memory wipe. According to Dr. Russell Barkley, the ADHD brain often experiences something called "time blindness." That means someone may not realize how much time has passed while focusing, making the disruption feel even more jarring. It’s like waking from a dream you were deeply lost in. Suddenly, you’re back in the real world, confused and annoyed.

Why Interrupting (and Being Interrupted) Feels So Intense with ADHD

Ever wonder why it drives you crazy when someone interrupts you—but you catch yourself doing it to others all the time?

If you have ADHD, the answer lies deep in how your brain handles thoughts, emotions, and attention.

Impulsivity Factor

Impulsivity can cause someone to speak before thinking or jump into a conversation too quickly. Impulsivity is a core feature of ADHD. When someone with ADHD has a thought, it often feels urgent. The brain rushes to get the idea out before it vanishes. This urgency comes from a fear that the thought will disappear if not said immediately. A big reason behind this behavior is tied to memory. People with ADHD often struggle with what's called object permanence—the ability to keep something in mind when it’s no longer right in front of them. That includes thoughts.

So, if a person with ADHD waits too long to speak, they might completely forget what they were going to say. This leads to blurting things out in the middle of someone else’s sentence.

In addition, ADHD makes it harder to regulate attention. Distraction plays a key role. A sound, a movement, or even a sudden thought can pull focus away from a conversation. When attention shifts like this, people with ADHD may jump into the discussion with something off-topic, just because it’s what’s on their mind at that moment.

Talking speed can also be a factor. Many people with ADHD talk rapidly because their thoughts are racing. This fast pace sometimes causes them to cut others off without meaning to. The words are trying to keep up with the thoughts, and that urgency drives the interruption.

This impulsivity isn’t limited to casual conversations. In a professional setting, it can have major consequences. For instance, Casey Dixon, an ADHD executive coach, describes how professionals with ADHD often struggle with self-regulation at work. Many of her clients, including lawyers and professors, find it hard to resist the pull of a new thought or distraction. Instead of holding back, they might jump into discussions, switch tasks, or interrupt because novelty is more stimulating for their ADHD brains.

Emotional Dysregulation in ADHD

Emotional dysregulation, a key part of ADHD, also helps explain this intense response.

According to Dr. Paul Rosen, a clinical psychologist and researcher at the University of Louisville School of Medicine, emotional dysregulation affects people across all ADHD types, but those with the combined type seem to show the most emotional challenges.

So what does this mean? While you might interrupt others without thinking, when you’re the one being interrupted, your brain may struggle to pause and process. The reaction comes fast and hard. You might feel sudden frustration, anger, or even sadness. Again, this reaction isn't always intentional or rational. It’s a result of the brain’s bottom-up emotional system working too strongly and the top-down control system not working well enough. In fact, about 75% of children with ADHD show some form of emotional dysregulation, compared to just 25% who don’t. This helps explain why reactions can seem exaggerated or out of proportion.

Overly Responsive Superior Colliculus

People with ADHD may have an overly responsive superior colliculus, a brain area that helps shift attention toward new stimuli. This part of the brain plays a major role in helping us notice changes in our environment.

But in ADHD, it overreacts. That means even small or unimportant stimuli can hijack attention, causing a rapid shift away from the current task.

The superior colliculus isn’t working alone. One study pointed out that this structure connects to broader brain networks involved in attention and arousal. When someone with ADHD is finally absorbed in a task—sometimes called hyperfocus—these networks help lock their attention in. But if something distracts them, the same networks that locked attention can suddenly break focus because of a signal from the colliculus. This flip is more abrupt and harder to control compared to people without ADHD.

This disruption gets worse when curiosity and impulsivity enter the picture. One study found that curiosity activates areas in the prefrontal cortex, striatum, and midbrain—all tied to dopamine, the brain’s reward system. In ADHD, these reward-sensitive areas are already more reactive.

So, when a new piece of information appears—even if it's irrelevant—it can feel incredibly urgent and rewarding to switch focus toward it.

Strategies to Cope

There are real, practical strategies to manage this pattern.

1. Be self aware. One of the most powerful tools is self-awareness. People with ADHD often interrupt because of impulsivity and a fast-moving mind. A thought comes in and bursts out before there’s time to think. Acknowledging the issue is a vital first step. Let trusted friends or family know you’re working on it. This kind of honesty helps build understanding rather than resentment. Try to use signal system. A loved one can give a subtle hand sign when you interrupt. This helps you build awareness without shame or public correction. Over time, it teaches your brain to pause.
2. Try Fidgeting. Try fidgeting with a small object, like a paperclip or rubber band. This physical activity can lower extra energy and help you stay present in the moment. Combined with this, note-taking during a conversation can boost your working memory. You don’t have to say everything immediately. Writing your thoughts down means they’re safe — and that allows you to listen longer without fear of forgetting.
3. Choose quiet spaces for important conversations. The environment plays a big role too. ADHD brains react strongly to stimulation. A noisy place makes it harder to hold attention and increases the urge to interrupt. Choose quiet spaces for important conversations and putting phones on silent. Less noise equals more focus.
4. Do some physical activities. Physical activity is another powerful strategy. Exercise can reduce impulsivity and boost focus. This helps quiet the urge to speak over others.
5. Be intentional. During conversations, being intentional helps. Make eye contact, nodding, and even gently holding the hand of someone close while they speak. These small actions ground you in the moment. If you feel the urge to interrupt, count slowly to ten. Ask yourself if what you want to say is worth the disruption. Most of the time, the answer will surprise you.
6. Do polite repair when an interruption slips out. Say, “I’m sorry, please continue,” or “May I interrupt?” These small phrases show respect and help build trust. Asking thoughtful questions about what the other person was saying also keeps the conversation moving and shows you care.

Learning curiosity about the speaker can shift your whole way of listening. When you stop thinking about your next sentence and instead focus on the person in front of you, communication improves naturally.

Final Words

The ADHD brain often reacts quickly, sometimes too quickly. That makes it hard to hold back a thought or stay in the moment. That same fast mind that jumps into conversations can also shut down when interrupted.

Know that you don’t have to fight your brain. Instead, you can work with it. Bit by bit, you can learn to protect your focus and connect with others without cutting them off. It starts with noticing and then choosing what to do next.

Frequently Asked Questions

What happens in the ADHD brain during an interruption?

It’s like closing a tab on a computer without saving. The brain has to restart, which is frustrating and tiring, especially during deep focus.

How can I tell if someone with ADHD is getting angry?

Watch for clenched fists, a loud voice, tense body language, or fast breathing. They might also shut down or struggle to explain how they feel.

How do I help my ADHD child manage their anger?

Set routines, teach simple emotion words, and use timers or pictures to explain time. Praise calm behavior and be patient—they’re still learning.

What’s one thing to say when setting boundaries nicely?

Try: “I’m in the middle of something. I’ll talk to you when I’m done.” It’s clear, kind, and shows you need space.